Dear friends,
At age nine, Michael Ostrolenk sat across from an overweight, chain-smoking psychiatrist who was supposed to fix his psychological issues.
After the session, young Michael turned to his mother with devastating clarity: "He's fat. He smokes. He can't help himself. How's he gonna help me?"
He walked out and never looked back.
That moment crystallized a truth most wellness "experts" desperately avoid: If you can't help yourself, you can't help others.
Now 54, Michael now embodies what happens when you live this principle. He completes 50-mile rucks with weighted vests. Maintains the physical capacity of someone half his age. After 43 years in martial arts and decades training Navy SEALs through SEALFIT and Unbeatable Mind Academy, he's built a system that actually works.
While 72% of Americans are overweight or obese, Michael gets comprehensive blood work every 3-6 months with precision medicine doctors at Apeiron Zoh. He's mapped his genetics. He knows exactly how his body processes everything from caffeine to saturated fat.
And, most importantly, he doesn't rely on willpower.
"A lot of the psychological issues we face are physiological," Michael explained. "If you feel like crap, it's hard to make psychological changes."
His four-pillar system addresses what he calls the fatal flaw in most health approaches—we treat symptoms while living in environments designed to create them:
Physiological: Diet, fitness, sleep as foundation (not afterthoughts)
Psychological: How you think about your thinking, the language you use with yourself
Social: Surrounding yourself with people who support growth, not sabotage it
Environmental: Physical spaces and products that shape behavior automatically
The genius is in his "via negativa" approach—instead of using willpower to avoid the bowl of M&Ms on your desk, remove the bowl entirely. Can't do pull-ups consistently? Install a pull-up bar on your office door. Every bathroom break becomes training.
One client couldn't meet the pull-up requirement for a 50-hour military-style endurance event. Michael's solution? No extra gym time. Just a pull-up bar on his office door. By test day, he crushed the standard—just by changing his door frame.
The One Thing You Can Do Today: Pick your biggest weakness. Instead of promising to resist it, physically remove it from your environment. No willpower required. Can't remove it? Make it inconvenient. Put the wine in the garage. Delete the app. Move the snacks to the highest shelf. Design your environment to make failure harder than success.
Michael lives nomadically between New York, Austin, and Ecuador—constantly testing and refining his systems. But after our hour-long conversation about optimization, blood markers, and special operations training, his parting words surprised me:
"You never know what anyone in front of you is going through. Just the kindest word could literally save someone's life."
Sometimes the most powerful intervention isn't a new system or supplement. Sometimes it's just being kind—starting with being kind enough to yourself to remove the things that make failure inevitable.
After all, you can't pour from an empty cup. And you certainly can't help others if you can't help yourself.
Golden light,
Dr. Richard L. Miller
Links & Resources:
Michael Ostrolenk's Website: michaeldostrolenk.com
LinkedIn: Michael Ostrolenk - Resilience Mastery
Instagram: @mostrolenk
SEALFIT: sealfit.com
Unbeatable Mind Academy: unbeatablemind.com
Apeiron Zoh: apeironzoh.com
1-minute mind control (my new book)
Traditional mindfulness and meditation techniques often require a huge investment of your most precious resource (time) without guarantees of results.
My own version of mindfulness—what I sometimes refer to as “mind control”—can be mastered in much less time if you commit to regular 60-90 second practice throughout the day.
Breathing. Witnessing. Changing the channel on negative thoughts.
I’ve honed these techniques over a lifetime of personal and professional practice, and now I’m sharing them with the world.
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Work with Me
After six decades as a practicing psychotherapist, I'm offering limited opportunities to work directly with me. I bring extensive experience addressing anxiety, depression, trauma, relationship challenges, addiction, and psychedelic integration.
One-to-one sessions - Individual therapy tailored to your specific needs and goals. To request an appointment, email DrRichardLMiller@gmail.com with subject line "Contact Request." Include what you hope to accomplish and your phone number.
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My Other Books:
Psychedelic Medicine at the End of Life: Dying Without Fear (release date: November 5)
Freeing Sexuality: Psychologists, Consent Teachers, Polyamory Experts, and Sex Workers Speak Out
Psychedelic Wisdom: The Astonishing Rewards of Mind-Altering Substances
Psychedelic Medicine: The Healing Powers of LSD, MDMA, Psilocybin, and Ayahuasca
Integral Psychedelic Therapy (co-edited with Jason A. Butler & Genesee Herzberg)
