Dear friends,
After more than sixty years of clinical work, I’ve learned that burnout doesn’t come from caring too little — it comes from caring without limits.
People in the helping professions often give until there is nothing left. We put patients, clients, students, families, and communities first, and quietly move ourselves to the bottom of the list. We tell ourselves we’ll rest later. We tell ourselves it’s selfish to stop.
Early in my career, a very old woman said something to me that I never forgot:
“The better you take care of yourself, the more you’ll have to give us.”
She was right.
Burnout is not a personal weakness. It’s what happens when care flows in only one direction for too long.
In this reflection, I speak about a few essential reminders — especially for those who give for a living:
Why caretakers must practice what they teach, or eventually burn out
The paradox of energy: when rest helps, and when movement restores more
How exercise creates energy rather than depleting it
Why fatigue often calls for connection, not isolation
The role of friends, family, and community in recovery from burnout
Why learning to say no protects your ability to say yes in the long run
How boundaries are an act of responsibility, not selfishness
I share examples from my own life, including walking alongside my wife during cancer treatment, where exercise, connection, and structure became essential tools — not optional extras.
When we’re burned out, the instinct is often to withdraw. But that is precisely when reaching out matters most. Human contact is health-enhancing. We are not meant to do this work — or this life — alone.
Taking care of yourself does not mean caring less about others.
It means ensuring there is something left to give.
If this reflection resonates with you, I invite you to sit with one question:
Where might you need a stronger boundary — so you can stay well enough to keep showing up?
Golden light,
Dr. Richard L. Miller
A note on working together
For those who feel drawn to working together more directly, I offer a limited number of one-on-one conversations.
These are not traditional therapy sessions. They are quiet, practical conversations focused on calming the mind, easing anxiety, and working with simple tools that support steadiness in daily life.
We move at a thoughtful pace. We work with what’s present. We focus on what helps.
If you’d like to learn more about working together one-on-one, you’re welcome to reply to this email, and my team will share additional details.
1-minute mind control (my latest book)
Traditional mindfulness and meditation techniques often require a huge investment of your most precious resource (time) without guarantees of results.
My own version of mindfulness—what I sometimes refer to as “mind control”—can be mastered in much less time if you commit to regular 60-90 second practice throughout the day.
Breathing. Witnessing. Changing the channel on negative thoughts.
I’ve honed these techniques over a lifetime of personal and professional practice, and now I’m sharing them with the world.
Get my new book Master Your Mind, and as a thank you for your support, I’ll give you a free 30-day subscription to our premium newsletter and exclusive content. Just reply to this email after you buy it to confirm your purchase.
Work with Me
After six decades as a practicing psychotherapist, I'm offering limited opportunities to work directly with me. I bring extensive experience addressing anxiety, depression, trauma, relationship challenges, addiction, and psychedelic integration.
One-to-one sessions - Individual therapy tailored to your specific needs and goals. To request an appointment, book a session here.
Group Therapy (waitlist) - Join a small, curated group dedicated to personal growth. You’ll tap into community support, learn from others’ experiences, and develop practical tools for lasting transformation. Reserve your spot.
Support my work with a founding subscription ($295) and get a complimentary 30-minute consultation, in addition to a hardback copy of Master Your Mind and full access to my premium content. Sign-up here:
My Other Books:
Psychedelic Medicine at the End of Life: Dying Without Fear (release date: November 5)
Freeing Sexuality: Psychologists, Consent Teachers, Polyamory Experts, and Sex Workers Speak Out
Psychedelic Wisdom: The Astonishing Rewards of Mind-Altering Substances
Psychedelic Medicine: The Healing Powers of LSD, MDMA, Psilocybin, and Ayahuasca
Integral Psychedelic Therapy (co-edited with Jason A. Butler & Genesee Herzberg)
