Notes an 87-year-old clinical psychologist

5 ways I shift my mood when the day goes sideways

Dear friends,

At eighty-seven, one realization has changed my life more than almost anything else:

Mood is not something that happens to me.

It is something I practice creating.

For much of my life I believed my mood came from the world around me —
from circumstances, from people, from events.

But over time I learned something different.

Much of a day’s emotional tone comes from within.

What follows is a short do-list.
Five ways I work with my mood when the day begins to go sideways.

1. I decide on my mood before the day begins.
   When I wake up, I pause for a moment and ask myself: What mood would I like to live in today?
   Then I begin the day with that tone in mind.

2. I reset my mood during the day.
   Moods drift. That’s natural. When I notice myself slipping into a state I don’t enjoy, I close my eyes for a moment, breathe, and choose again.

3. I watch what I say to myself.
   The mind records everything it hears.
   If I criticize myself repeatedly, those words accumulate.
   If I speak with encouragement and kindness, those words accumulate as well.

   

4. I pause before responding.
   Reacting happens quickly. Responding happens thoughtfully.
   A short pause often allows a calmer and wiser response to emerge.

5. I stabilize my body before I change my mood.
   When emotions rise, I start with the body.
   A few slow breaths from the abdomen calm the nervous system and steady the mind. Once the body settles, choosing a different mood becomes much easier.

There is something remarkable about being human:

We have influence over the tone of our inner life.

Not perfect control. But real influence.

I don’t claim mastery of this.
I practice.
I forget.
I begin again.

Today, take one moment to notice your mood.

If you wish, choose the one you would like to live in — and step into it.

If you feel inclined, you’re welcome to write back and share how it goes.

Golden Light,

Dr. Richard Louis Miller

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A note on working together

For those who feel drawn to working together more directly, I offer a limited number of one-on-one conversations.

These are not traditional therapy sessions. They are quiet, practical conversations focused on calming the mind, easing anxiety, and working with simple tools that support steadiness in daily life.

We move at a thoughtful pace. We work with what’s present. We focus on what helps.

If you’d like to learn more about working together one-on-one, you’re welcome to reply to this email and my team will share additional details.

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1-minute mind control (my latest book)

Traditional mindfulness and meditation techniques often require a huge investment of your most precious resource (time) without guarantees of results.

My own version of mindfulness—what I sometimes refer to as “mind control”—can be mastered in much less time if you commit to regular 60-90 second practice throughout the day.

Breathing. Witnessing. Changing the channel on negative thoughts.

I’ve honed these techniques over a lifetime of personal and professional practice, and now I’m sharing them with the world.

Get my new book Master Your Mind, and as a thank you for your support, I’ll give you a free 30-day subscription to our premium newsletter and exclusive content. Just reply to this email after you buy it to confirm your purchase.

My Other Books:

• Psychedelic Medicine at the End of Life: Dying Without Fear (release date: November 5)

• Freeing Sexuality: Psychologists, Consent Teachers, Polyamory Experts, and Sex Workers Speak Out

• Psychedelic Wisdom: The Astonishing Rewards of Mind-Altering Substances

• Psychedelic Medicine: The Healing Powers of LSD, MDMA, Psilocybin, and Ayahuasca

• Integral Psychedelic Therapy (co-edited with Jason A. Butler & Genesee Herzberg)